Drama Mama for Hire…….

Our littlest and last heads off to kindergarden next fall. Im bound to think about my resume and the hunt for a part time job. I mean, I do kinda have to earn my keep around here eventually. Vacations nearly over!

I currently have a 12 year gap in my resume. One I plan to quickly fill with the varying tasks of motherhood that must surely count for something.

So here it is. Drama mama for hire and 12 years of experience that I refuse to make no mention of…..

I have spent the last 12 years doing the following. Not always in this order and sometimes repeatedly.

Bore 3 children. 2 and 3/4 of them have been without pain meds. Nursed each child for about 18 months. My breasts have been sucked dry, cracked, bit, bleeding, sore and swollen. They have leaked and squirted in public. I have been milked like a cow fairly often. They are currently uneven and traveling southbound.

I am a teacher, a nurse, taxi service, chef and  housekeeper daily. I am in charge of all aspects of laundry and cleaning and some light house maintenance. I am an entertainment supervisor and provider. Both adult and PG entertainment : )

I provide spa services. Back scratch services, massages and hair and nail care.

Dental hygienest ensuring the best care for little mouths.

I could be considered a ENT after 12 years of experience with tube surgeries and ear issues.

Exterminator. Known around these parts for my mad skills to kill house flys. Also knows for killing “bats” (a.k.a in the less dramatic world, mosquitos.)

Animal caretaker and catcher. Finder of lost dogs and bunnies.

Dragon Slayer. A metaphor really and cuz it sounds cool.

I organize events for my family and their friends. Dinners, parties, outings, field trips etc. Deal with a wide range of people pleasing and dealings…all ages and stages and mental outlooks.

I am a counselor. All kinds of counseling. I give advice and my opinion often. I get advice and am offered opinions just the same, sometimes unfortunately.

Grief counselor. I once spent four hours consoling a hormonal 11 year old about a dead turtle on the side of the road. I almost let her bring him home to give it a proper burial….but the stink was to much to bear.

I have most recently added hazardous waste materials and center for disease control services as well. I have handled a household with a tick infestation and lice infestation. I once watched a Dr. pull out head first a tick from my daughters face. I have disected human fecal matter for pinworm several times a year. I have been pooped on, spit up on and throwed up on. I have had baby vomit in my mouth and poop on my hand. I have slipped on human waste and animal waste. I have fished a spider and bunny poop out of a toddlers mouth. I have stuck my hand in a toilet with human feces to fish out a very special and rare squinky. I have spent days searching for cause of funky smells. I have cleaned out a minivan with moldy old not so happy meal leftovers. I have made my daughter wear a pair of cute boots with foreign molded substance stuck up in the toe for an entire day in the name of fashion.

I have never been incarcerated however I have been questioned by police about neighbors alarm going off after I entered it to borrow some cheese while she was out of town.

A swim instructor and lifeguard.

Pain endurance trainer. As well as aforementioned childbirths, I once had my already broken toes run over by a motorized wheelchair driven by my mother at Disney.  A magical place really. In the name of love and Disney we kept on walking. Love you mom.

Pediatricians assistant. Several times I found myself lying on top on my children just so they could get shots administered.

I am a master of multi tasking. I once cooked a delicious dinner, nursed a baby, helped with fractions and a science project all at the same time. (I won first place that year too…..I mean Taylor won.)

Fashion director for three girls. I shop and lay out their outfits. I deal with difficult drama queens all day long. Where oh where could they have gotten that from?????

Wrestling referee, judge and police officer.  I discern fault and give out consequences. I make sure they are followed through. I break up fights and make children go back to the stores to apologize for stealing candy bars and gum.

I am a bank teller and financial advisor.  I give out money and tell them how to use it.

I am also a community volunteer, Sunday school teacher and room mom for my kids classrooms.

Comedian. I make people laugh by sharing my life stories and events.

Cheerleader. I will stand in the bathroom and coach you step by step till you poop and then throw you a poop party when you do. 3 and under only please.

An avid supporter of the local library system. I check stuff out. Bring it back late. Pay late fees thus my support to the local library system.

Private investigator and CSI…cuz a moms gotta get the full story first.

Movie critic, book critic, all around supervisor teacher and counselor for all things related to adolescence, puberty, sexual education,the human body and its functions and purpose.

Not easily scared. Obviously. ^^^^^

References available upon request.

Available fall of 2012. Must be very flexible and able to flee at any moment as all the above is a never ending and all consuming priviledge. It’s my top priority, my ultimate purpose in this life. It’s who I am. I am mommy for hire.

Everlasting Love By Taylor Donovan

The following is a story written by our 12 year old daughter. It’s for a school project in writing. She had to write a story. The topic was her choice and could be about anything. A boy in her class is writing about potatoes.  She came home with this. We were absolutely blown away. While girls her age are getting interested in boys and dating, this is a timely and age appropriate message. And yet another perfect example of how God is present in public schools…thru believing children.  Aside from some light editing, moving around sentences and spell check…it’s all hers.

Sometimes I share an article in support of the writer and its subject. It brings be an unexplainable amount of pleasure to share this young writers story with you…..

Everlasting Love by Taylor Donovan

What do you think of when you hear the word “love?” Do you think about hugs, kisses, dating, marriage, or things? Let me take a few minutes to share what I think the true meaning of love is.

The dictionary defines love  as affection or concern, devotion to someone or something. You might say that it has something to do with a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a pet. Maybe you think about hugging a friend or a family member. How about a sick elderly person, or hugging a stranger? Would you do that? Why or why not?

Do you think about dating when you think about love? Do you date because you want to feel accepted or loved. Do you do it to compete with others or because everyone else is doing it?

Some think of marriage when you talk about the word love. The big, big word marriage. When you get married, you make a promise, a commitment to someone and say two very important words. “I do.” When you say those words do you mean them? Or is it a temporary thing until something better happens? Is marriage, forever love? God wants you to say those words like you mean them, like you care. When you have fights with your husband or wife God wants you to fight for them, not with them.

Let’s get back to what I think the true meaning of love is.

In the bible, John 3:16 gives the definition of true love. It says “for God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son so that whosoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life.” This verse says that God loves us so much that He gave all of us a second chance . A chance to live forever in Heaven with HIm someday.

There is a way to Heaven. My dad says there is only one way. Some people think you can get to Heaven by going to church or if you’re a good person.  Some classify themselves as Christians and think that’s the way to Heaven. Going to church, getting baptized, and giving offerings are all good things to do. But when you do those things do you think good things about yourself or do you give God the glory for it? Those things don’t give you life’s answers. It’s just a way to show God that you are ready to follow Him. Following Jesus is the way to Heaven and Jesus is also what true love is. It’s because of Him that we love at all. He shows us what true love is and teaches us how to love.

My family and I go to a little church thats not a big dazzling building. We meet at a restaurant. Church isn’t about the building itself but what happens inside the building. Kind of like the “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” saying. It matters more about what’s inside than outside. True love doesn’t care about what you look like. When we make a commitment to God to follow Him it’s like we say “I do” to God. God loves us more than anyone else in the whole world.

We are about to celebrate Easter. Jesus was beaten, wore a crown of thorns and was nailed to a cross and died. Three days later he rose from the grave. He did this for you and me because of love. In Jeremiah 3:31 God says “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” 1 John4:16 “God is love.”

That’s what love is.

Why Good Friday is Good

An age old question. One that I use to ask my parents and now my children ask me. A good question.”What makes Good Friday good?”

I’ve made a connection this morning, one that I hadn’t made before. And so I share my learnings with you.

No good feelings come when we think upon the beating of our Savior. The pain and suffering he endured in itself musn’t feel good. We mourn and weep as we watch it in the movie The Passion or when we hear it or read it. So what makes it good?

Jesus makes Good Friday good. Not because of how his flesh was torn, but why it was torn.

Because the why of it all translates a love so deep it’s beyond our comprehension.

Three days later… He lives. That is good.

This Easter is my 15th birthday….my second birthday that is. The day I saw for the very first time, why His flesh was torn.

It was love. It was personal. Very personal. That is good.

As I prepare my heart for Easter this year I understand it a little deeper as God gracefully meets me to reveal new things about Him. I realize that amidst all the pain and suffering of Good Friday…..it is ultimately good. Ultimately meaning, maybe you can’t fully understand this now…but soon you will. Soon and very soon. As his friends and family watched him severely beaten, watched him get nailed to and hung on a cross and then draw his last breath..they must have been filled with not only sorrow but confusion…Why?

Three days later the ultimate good was seen and touched and yet His scars remain.

Whatever pain and suffering we endure here on earth is minimal to what Christ endured on the cross. Nevertheless it is real pain for us and it hurts so bad sometimes we hardly think we can endure it another day. Although we cannot understand the why of it all we can be encouraged that soon and very soon we will see the ultimate good in all of it if we so choose to wait for it.  We can also cling to the why that we already know in the meantime…..the why of the cross. Love love love….amazing love.

Amazing love how could it be that You my King would die for me?

Good Friday is good because of the sacrifice made on our behalf. The flesh ripping beating that Jesus endured was for you and I…and He endured it for He knew what ultimate good would come of it. A debt paid in full that no one would ever have to pay again…the way to Heaven….hope of eternal life with our Creator. Fellowship with God Himself….how it was meant to be but wasn’t anymore that will be again forever and ever Amen. All because of you Jesus.

This is why Good Friday is good. It’s also the most perfect example of how good ultimately comes from pain…. life from death…. ashes to beauty…sorrow to joy.  Surely a lesson we can all find encouragement in. If you can’t see it yet….wait for it. It will surely come. It will surely come.

Easter blessings to you all, with all the love in my heart and hope for you to be found in it.

The Yours Mine and Ours Dance

It’s been a while huh? Well, it’s certainly not due to the lack of drama..that’s fo sure! I’ve just had a complete creative block the last few weeks……not even a funny FaceBook status to share…so sad.

Welp, here I am. Here. I have no idea where here is yet, but I’m there….here….in this new place.

The days just blend, a continuing and never ending to-do list. Before I finish one list I have already started another. No real clarity lately. Don’t get me wrong, life is good. It’s been good. Lots of changes and growing and learning…..all good. I guess I’m just trying to find my place in this new season of life.

If you’re confused, just think about how I feel…geesh. Let’s try to figure out where I’m at…..

I’ve got three girls ages 5, 9 and the oldest is 12 in 8 days. I’m in three different stages of parenting all at once. A little one who is cute and adorable and thinks I’m still a rock star. The middle is..well, just that…in the middle. She’s still super cute, she kind of still thinks I’m great…but she’s still learning that those things she once did she’s too old for and the things she wants to do she’s too young for…if that makes sense?

Then there’s the oldest whose 12 in 8 days. She’s a tricky one. Left cute a while ago and is entered into adolescent semi-awkwardness with a heaping cup of beautiful. I am so far from rock star status. I’m like a one hit wonder. She is pretty sure she knows more than me and that her ideas are better than mine. Who-da thunk I’d ever be here????I thought I had her pegged as the first born perfect little child….I’m learning now that she is SO not that. She’s graduating elementary school and headed to a Jr/Sr high next fall with really big kids in a really big school in a really big world. Her body is changing, her face is changing, her conversations and responses are changing and I’m just trying to keep up with her and still remember the seasons of the younger two and what’s appropriate for them all each individually and together.

All the while trying to maintain the usual daily tasks with a thankful humble heart. All the while trying to be who I’m supposed to be to them. I’m learning that this changes a bit as time goes on. I’ll always be mom, but that looks a little different today than it did when they were newborns. I look different. I am different.  How to be mom to a preschooler, elementary schooler, and a middle schooler all at once….

I’m just being real with you…with where I’m at. I’ve not lost my footing…I know where I stand and I know  who holds me and my family in the palms of His hand….. I’m just being re-positioned at the present time and the unknown of it all causes me to wonder. I am full of wonder. Wonder full. I know that wonder reveals a hope in the unknown…..that is good thing.

Whenever I’m in a place where things are unknown..I try to remember to cling to what I already know.

That God is with me and is everything I need.  He has blessed me with an amazing family. He very intentionally wove these 3 beautiful girls in my womb and decided to choose me to be their co-caretaker.

I don’t know about you, but I tend to take better care of things that are not mine. Knowing I have to return them makes me extra careful.

So really, they are not my kids but His. He gave them to me. He knows their beginning and end and all their in betweens….mine too.

I’m a  little more clear now.

I completely trust Him. Sometimes it’s like a uncomfortable dance of the wills. Yours…mine….yours…mine….yours…..mine.

They are yours ultimately…they are mine here. Ours together is right and good.

Being a mom and a drama queen is really tough work. Since becoming a mom it’s also quite apparent that dancing is tough too. I used to be good at it. Now my kids just laugh and  make funny faces. They think it’s just plain wrong. Me and dancing that is.

So this recovering mama drama queen can improve her dancing skills . I will stop trying to take the lead and start following His lead. Like a little girl who puts her feet on tops of her daddy’s feet. Yep, that’s where I’m at. And that’s a really good place to be.

How about you? Where are you at my friends? Share your mama drama with me.

Lice Warrior

Because I am still recovering, traces of drama queen still remain. I believe the pestilence I am about to share, even though common, a good reason and cause to be overly dramatic.

I sit with a warmed up cup instead of fresh. I take a break to write this as I know the writing will bring a needed calm. I am nearing 48 hours mark, of lice infestation. I have three girls….with long hair. One has it bad, so I treat the whole family to avoid me having to do this more often than necessary.

I am Lice Warrior. Just add that to my mommy resume.

I have never had lice myself, and my kids thankfully have escaped this pestilence as well until now. I have birthed two out of three without pain meds, had my face cut open to remove skin cancer, deal with pinworm at least twice a year, had the entire family (all 5 of us) throwing up all at once, had child and dog throw up at the same time very recently, 8 ear surgeries, 1 tonsil surgery, 1 asthmatic child who tells us she doesnt want to die while having an episode, stitches, broken bones, had my mom run over my foot with her motor scooter while my toes were already broken……you get the point. You can’t scare me for one and two: NOTHING I have endured thus far compares to this. NOTHING.

Maybe you think I’m being overly dramatic.

Maybe because I write this while knee deep in lice. But I hardly think I’m being overly dramatic….it’s seriously such a nuisance.

Thank you for hearing me out. I can feel the stress trickling down.

Oops I forgot to tell you that I just started my cycle. That must be what the trickling down feeling is.

I spend a gazillion dollars at Walgreens for lice treatment. My house looks like Elliots house from ET with all the white suits and bubbles into and out of the house. (Ok THAT was being overly dramatic and exaggerating)

I spend the day striping linens and washing blankets, spraying mattresses and vacuming floors. The kids come home and I strip them down, and start treating them, one by one. First middle, then oldest then littlest and last. We start at exactly 2:45. This happens to be the night that my husband is working all night long. I’m happy for him.

I put in lice shampoo, wait 10 minutes exactly, rinse, comb out every single strand of hair with lice gel, look thru eye loop trying to identify little white things, blow dry, suffocate with hair gel and hair cap and repeat 2 more times for the sisters and again for myself. The time now is 7:30pm. Of course the lice hosts are tired and hungry. Hopefully the lice are dead and dying.  So I make dinner, put in a movie for them and call it a night.

Saturday morning my honey makes breakfast. Then we begin round two. Mayonaise and Crisco stage. One stick per head, lather it in there real good, put on a cap and wait 4 hours. Greasy faced lice hosts are quickly getting cabin fever and we are running out craft supplies and movies.

All the while the lice laundry is getting washed and dried non stop and the regular laundry is getting ignored. Boiling water to clean off any lice combs and hair ties and caps. Vacuming floors etc etc etc.

And we start washing out mayo and crisco. Shampoo’d three times each head just to get it out. Lice comb thru each strand of hair, combing out millions of tiny little eggs. I proudly saved a brown little thing I picked out. He said it was  a sesame seed. I said she hadn’t eaten anything with sesame seeds. I am lice warrior!

7:30 pm: We have read lots of different articles on home remedies. Tonight we try a new one. Tea tree oil and listerine. We spray it till soaking and cover with swim cap. Rub tea tree oil on the neck. Cotton balls above the eyes to avoid drips. I wish I took a pic to show you.

Wakey Wakey Sunday morning. Only 1 out of 5 of us still have swim cap on. The littlest and last with her eyes pressed down from the tight cap. She wins the ‘who can keep it on all night long’ contest. We skip church. Wash out listerine, blow dry, eat breakfast. Laundry laundry laundry vaccum….yada yada yada.

And after I finish this post I will then soak every head in vinegar for 2 hours then wash out with palmolive dish soap. Blow dry, lice comb etc etc…..

I hardly think I’m being overly dramatic. This is so time consuming. What in the world do people that have more than 3 kids do?

I am tired. I am over it. But I am lice warrior.

On the positive side, it’s a three day weekend and their hair has never been more clean, more brushed, more soft. Not one single knot. Sometimes these pestilences come only to force something that needed to get done. My linens did need some changing, and their hair desperately needed some attention. It would have been nice for it to not happen in conjunction with my cycle….but whatever.

Thanks for letting me share my drama. I’m gonna go brew me a nice fresh cup and get started….well not started, continued…..No rest until I slay every single one. I am lice warrior.

My Valentine

I met the most wonderful man in August of 1996. 1.5 years later he asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. He is my love, my best friend, my valentine.

He makes me laugh every single day. He has my heart. I love him more than words can say.

We have 3 beautiful girls. One of the most important things I can do as their mom is to love their daddy well. In words and in actions….to love him well.

I do love to love him. He makes it so easy. He is such an incredible man, a loving husband. He is such a great daddy. He is especially a great daddy for girls. He loves us well.

He is unlike any man I have ever met. He is so true and genuine and thoughtful. Caring and compassionate…such a good listener. One of my favorite things about him is his ability to communicate with people. It’s such an art to be able to do that well.

A true artist. Love my hard working man with calloused hands that strum the guitar. I was his groupie…ok I still am his groupie.

Tall dark and handsome. His handsome-ness increases with age. So unfair!

My protector. I feel safe with him. I know that he would take a bullet before he let anything happen to his girls.

A dedicated and hard working man who is trustworthy, responsible, reliable, dependable…..

Oh my love. I can’t possibly do this justice.  To try and explain how I love you….

Words comes easy most of the time. But I can’t find the ones that fit just right, and I am overwhelmed with emotion as I try.

I love you so much.

These next few sentences pretty much sum up who he is.  When we first met, I was all about the romance…..he was all about me finding me. He wanted me to find out who I was. Those were his intentions with me. Young and lost I was when we met. Confused, unsure….I needed to find myself, my worth. He refused to let me find my worth in him. I’m not sure if you understand this, but one could confuse these things as meaning that he didn’t care for me. That’s what I did. I misunderstood his intentions. It wasn’t until I finally found me in all that….became my own person apart from him or anyone else…..that I clearly saw how much he cared for me. That’s what love does. This is the man that I love to love.

Thanks for being apart of my growing. For helping me go from lost to found. For showing me the way. For being – for me.

He is often misunderstood, but the truth that lies behind and beneath his actions shows a true love. One that acts not on what feels right, but what is right. This is my love. I could not appreciate him anymore than I do today. Truly truly.

To my valentine. With love and gratitude to you for loving me and our girls. For being you….who we love dearly and deeply.  We are so thankful for your life.

Happy Valentines Day love.

To Mom and Dad… With Love

Dad has very recently been diagnosed with an aggressive prostate cancer….thus the reason I share this love letter to them in public. To say what I really feel but often forget to say it out loud.

My mom and dad have been married for 42 years. This Valentines day would be 43 years since they first met. Happy Anniversary!

Thank you both for a lifetime of love and sacrifice. I know with every cell in my body that you loved me just the very best way you knew how. Everything you did, was for our family. Every choice you made was for us. You did whatever you could to make sure we had a nice home, nice clothes, family vacations……the American dream. I am who I am today partly because of my mom and dad. A lot partly.

I spend a lot of time these days giving credit to my faith for where I am today. This is truth. But I hope that hasn’t overshadowed you, or minimized who you have been to me.

A stable home environment, with parents who loved eachother with an almost suffocating love for eachother, has taught me more than I probably even realize. Sure we’ve got dysfunction…..but who doesn’t right? Aside from all that, their undying love for each other and commitment to each other and our family outweighs any of the ugly bad stuff we had to endure. Some stuff they had to endure……

My mom lost her mom, her dad and her sister. Years ago almost one right after the other. I’m not sure she really ever got over it. Old wounds never properly healed feel fresh even still today.

My dad lost his dad and had to make great sacrifices for his family because of it. That coupled with some other trials, has left him deeply scarred I think. Old wounds never properly healed feel fresh even still today.

I share this for a few reasons. One, we don’t talk much about it anymore and two, I know your’e hurting still. This new diagnosis, is bound to bring up old wounds. Now what happens is that old wounds not healed, and new fresh wounds…will couple themselves up together and make a big fat bunch of hurt and pain. It will be more painful to endure. This stress on your heart would be too much.

Imagine a bullet wound.  Imagine the bullet wound not healed properly. Years later this will arise again and continue to be a problem until its properly healed. It likely will cause an infection. Imagine a new wound…where the old unhealed wound is. That would be a lot more painful to endure…a new one on top of an already open wound unhealed don’t you think?

It’s important to take care of your wounds properly. Doctors orders.

Let me just say this. You gave me a good life. I have no regrets. I have no terrible tormenting memories as a child. You did good.  My kids think you are the bomb. You loved me well. I am a pretty normal adult woman with no major mental health concerns….aside from my dramatics.  You are a part of me and part of my successes. You loved me through all my highs and lows.

I love you. I appreciate you.

Did you make mistakes? Sure. We all do. I make them every single day.What should I do with them? Should I wallow in self pity? What would tell me to do? As my parent what you tell your daughter to do after a big mistake? Would you still love me? Would you still accept me? Would you tell me to spend the rest of my life in regret?

As your daughter I now give answers to those same questions to you. I answer them the same way you would answer me.

It’s time to get well, get on with the healing so you can get thru this next trial.  Move on. Forgetting whats behind and pressing on to what lies ahead. Don’t try to get thru today while walking around carrying those heave burdens from the past. Let it go. I give you my permission. Not that you need my permission, but maybe you just need to give yourself permission. Permission to heal….to let it go.  You’ve carried it long enough. Let it go.

Poof your healed. I wish I could poof it all a way for you. I know I can’t. But here is what I can do……tell the world how much I love you and how great I think you are. Remind you of the good that you have done with the hope that it might ease some of your hurt. A little nudge in the right direction.

In my heart I hold your hands thru this.

To my mom Marlene and my dad Arthur….with love. Hoping and praying for true healing and telling the world how I love you so. Thanks for being mom and dad. Nana and papa. Now go and be healed and set free.

Staci

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If it feels like a wear your purple froggy rain boots kinda day then why wear the mary janes?

My title is a bit of a mouth full…..please allow me to explain.

We have three girls. We decided early on that we would choose not to pick this as one of our battles with them. Parents have a difficult enough task at picking which battles to fight….and then deciding how to fight it. That being said, we let them wear whatever they choose as long at it fits them appropriately and conforms to the days weather. On special occassions and days that I spend money for picture taking I do have a say. But then again they do too, so we try to work together and compromise. Once they meet those requirements…..I’m good. Kinda. There are those days when they meet aforementioned rules but they have a Pipi Longstocking, Fancy Nancy meets Punky Brewster kinda look.

Today the middle freckly 9 year old has a get up on that made me do a double take. I look at her before we walk out the door “Really?” I ask her. Her smile makes the freckles on her nose bunch up “I love it!” she replies.

Alrighty then and out the door.

The littlest and last is quickly learning the ways of her older sisters. She has become quite the dresser herself. Her new fettish are her purple froggy rain boots. Purple with green frogs and pink hearts. She wears them everyday, to everyplace we go, and with just about any kind of outfit. Fancy dresses, pajamas, shorts, skirts, leggings her cinderella dress…..

Today is a school day for her. It’s also chapel day. Once a week she has to wear a green polo shirt for chapel. All the kids are asked to wear them. She asks me each night if she has school the next day, and she asks me if it’s a chapel day so she knows to be prepared if she has to wear it.

Today she comes out with a blue polka dot skirt, her green polo, her sisters knee high polka dotted neon socks that go all the way up her leg and then some, and her purple rain boots with green frogs and pink hearts. She accented this lovely look with a silver gem studded head band that doesnt even sit on top of her head but she wears it as a headband across her forehead with her uncombed hair that smells like breakfast. The recent hair cut that she gave herself where she has only one bang shows itself off from underneath.  Let’s not forget the lovely bottle of sand art that she made and wears as a necklace. Can you just picture this delicious preschooler?

I hand her a pair of mary janes and white socks. I gently make a suggestion to change. She tells me she doesnt want to but tries it on anyway. She comes out crying and I ask her what the matter is. She tells me she really doesn’t want to wear them because she thinks her friends will laugh at her. She’s 4. Did she even look at herself with the frog boots and neon knee highs? She thinks THAT outfit makes her a less likely target for laughter then the simple mary janes and white socks.? Weird.

Alrighty then and out the door.

She is very confidently wearing it. I am very confidently walking with her. We walk into school. A private Christian school, very good school, have loved every experience there thus far. I gotta couple a looks tho. They weren’t the ‘oh how cute’ look either. They were the ‘I can’t believe you let your daughter walk outta the house like that’ kinda look. On a uniform day! Oh the horror.  One even looked her up and down.

My thought was “just you wait sister.” Sure I could choose not to let her wear whatever she feels like. I could make her wear something that is pressed and perfectly matching with her hair combed and perfectly parted. Only on special occassions do I attempt a part. Your lucky if I even brush it most days. Honestly, sometimes we skip the shower and freshen up with a little detangler. Does this make me a bad mommy? Maybe. But I choose instead to give her a freedom. Kids that age don’t get many freedoms, so this one I freely give her with a few minor strings attached and I’m hopeful it will only help in her becoming a girl who can think for herself, a leader, a trend setter not follower.

Would it be better to be neatly pressed and prodded but have a selfish and hard heart?  As long as we all looked the part..is that what matters most?  I think most would agree that should not be so. We are all a little guilty of this is some manner though aren’t we?

Do we sometimes wear a smile when we feel a frown? Pretending it’s all ok when really it’s not.  When the pain is deep in our bones but we don’t let anyone in because we fear what the world would think of us. Either way we are pretending. We pretend to be good, we pretend to be bad, we pretend that we are this person or that person. But are we being real?

What in the world does this have to do with purple frog boots?

If it feels like a wear your purple froggy rain boots kinda day, then why do we put on the mary janes? Maybe we need to just let it all hang out and be real instead of trying to fit into a certain mold of expectations and acceptabilities. Maybe being real is too hard. Maybe we don’t even know who that is. Maybe it means we cry… a lot. Puddles of tears is too messy……

It is if your wearing your mary janes.

Put your purple froggy rain boots on and dance in the rain.

Inconvenience and Incontinence. Yes Both.

Some days are just plain weird. If it wasn’t for my faith, someone just might be able to convince me that I am still reaping the consequences of the broken mirror curse….or something silly like that.

My day starts at 5am. Since the last time change, my man and I thought we’d just not turn back the clock in the bedroom. We would pretend it was normal time to wake, but really we’d have a whole extra hour to spare. To sip coffee in the dark and cuddle before it was really time to wake the troops and head off to work and school. It’s been sweet quiet time. I highly recommend it.

Back to my day. Starts at 5am. My honey leaves at 630 and it’s time to wake kids. 3 kids have school today. One starts at 720 today as she does only twice a week, the other starts at 8 and the littlest and last starts at 9. Drop one off then two…then home for 45 minutes to do housework till last is off to school. Today I have several things to tackle that require phone calls. Let me back up a few months and rabbit trail down another story about my phone……you’ll see why soon. I promise to be back to this story in a bit.

Taking a stroll in the neighborhood one evening with the new puppy, brand spankin new phone in my pocket. Just got it that day…for free. Its an upgrade. Stop to chat with a new neighbor. We talk a lot longer than my bladder could stand. I hate to break away from such a good neighborly chat. Eventually I start to leak, and so I make a quick exit as subtle as one who is about to pee in their pants can be.

I am running home at this point. Kids ahead of me, I see my sweet love leaning against the car with a freshly poured cup of coffee for me. I beeline for the door and pass him up….he smiles cuz he totally knows where I’m headed. I do not pass up a cup easily…..but this was an emergency pass up the coffee kinda situation. Sweet relief for mama has finally come. I change my clothes for obvious reasons here…..and I quickly toss the ones I had on in the washer hoping to escape any explanations to the husband and children and kill any and all evidence of incontinence.

Several hours pass and I realize my clothes are still sitting in the wash…..so I wash them again just to make sure they are clean. Then they sit there overnight and I wash them again because now they smell like wet laundry that sat too long. 3 times I wash. Never once did I wonder where my brand new pretty cool phone was.

“Oh no. Oh my goodness.” (I just realized)

I find the phone in the washer. Not in my pants but out in the open. Totally dead, wont even turn on. I try the rice thing. I am now without a phone. No land line. That is so last decade. I have no phone and I feel so lost without one! Phone company has no pity on me or my incontinence. They simply cannot send me another phone for free. It cannot be fixed. I just accept my punishment for washing (peeing) on my new phone. A friend gives me their old phone to use. I am so thankful for it. The battery does not last very long on it, but nevertheless it’s a phone. This is the one I’ve been using for 5 months now. Today the phone barely keeps a charge and the only way for me to make a long call is for me to be attached to a charger. The car charger is dead so now the only way is to be home, or near an outlet. Like the old days attached to a cord. Crazy. I am a spoiled little brat complaining of the inconvenience of incontinenance and using a phone attached to a wall.

Ok so we are back now. Remember that today is the day I need to tackle several things on my to do list that require a phone. I try to tackle one in 45 minutes before littlest goes off to school. Attatched to my wall charger, the dog needs to go out. Littlest lets her out back.  Houston there’s a problem….dog is fussing with an animal back there. Mama switches hats to animal rescue worker and unattaches the phone charger to do both at the same time. Im a wanna be master of multi-tasking, I head to the yard to assess the situation. Puppy has baby snapper turtle in mouth. I wrestle with her to drop it.  Phone still in ear but it’s now beeping and warning me to quickly recharge or there will be a dropped call. I can’t waste the 10 minutes on hold….so I race to the wall with baby turtle in hand. Standing there a minute, wondering what in the world do I do now. Dog wants turtle back, littlest wants to hold it too. Dog tracks in dirt. I need to clean it. I need to pee. I need a cup of coffee. I really need someone to answer this call……I take a chance, I run baby turtle back to a safe zone and race back to wall hoping to not have missed the customer service rep yet…and I make it. Wheeew! (Just as an additional side note here. This happened Friday. On Saturday my crazed puppy picked up something else on a walk around the neighborhood…..a dirty tampon. But that’s a story for another day.)

O.K. 45 minutes is nearly up, I get a person on the line finally but I have to walk out the door. I explain my phone situation and ask for a call back at 9:30 in case I lose them. I head out the door with girl, backpack, lunchbox, purse, phone unattached to charger and a coffee. Still need to pee tho. As I grab the doorknob I spill the coffee all over myself : D …..surprisingly without even skipping a step or having a second thought, I leave the dropped cup on the floor, spilled coffee left, and stained wet coffee stained clothes I wear and I just walk out the door. Only a mom in a serious rush can do that right? Call dropped. Oy!

Drop off littlest and last in my stained clothes and head back home. I continue to do my business on the phone until 10:30. I am trying to get a new phone. I very late in the game realized I pay for insurance each month and that should have covered the phone that I washed cuz I peed a little. O.K. a lot. Whatever…..I should totally get a new phone outta this mess.

Phone business starts at 8 and goes till 8:45. I spilled a cup of coffee on me and saved  baby turtle from a crazed puppy in that time. I take 3rd child to school and resume at 9:30 for another hour. This does not include the calls I’ve made all last week trying to deal with this and lost the calls while trying to and just didn’t want to start that long story all over again and stopped trying. I added it up to 3 hours so far.

It’s the fourth hour and I finally get a woman to hear me out without interruption who feels bad enough to just send me a new phone for free. Just as she says she will do that I realize I still have got to go potty. I unattach and take her with me. I flush and the call drops…..” Crap.” No pun intended. I re-attach and call again hoping to get the same girl. Of course that’s not possible apparently, and our convo hasnt been logged yet so I just decide to trust that she will email me the confirmation and do as she said she would do. I figure I’ll call again later, so I go down my list of things and make a new call. My phone is not in service any longer it says. “Your account cannot be verified”…..I can’t even make a call. Attached or not…..no calls. I can call the provider tho but not one person can tell me what’s going on. “Shut your phone off for 2 minutes. Shut it off for 5 minutes. Take your battery out”……Nothing. No help.They tell me to go online. There system redirects me to some strange site. I actually at this point think that maybe this is the end of the world. I am totally seriously considering this so I turn on the news. I’m ready to go and pick up all three kids and stock up on non-perishables. I decide to take a trip to the phone store first. If I see anything out of the ordinary I am going to pick them up. Nothing on the news, no strange out of the ordinary sights and the girl at the phone store figures it all out. Our system is down thats why you cant get online. They sent you a new phone and activated the new one so thats why this one wont work……Finally some answers. She fixes it and confirms my new phone. I get back home at 11am to continue my business. I head out at noon with clean clothes on now, go food shopping, come home eat lunch (more like cram it down my throat in 60 seconds then really “eat” but whatever) and then it’s time to pick up kids from school.

How was your day mommy? What did you do today?”

What’s a recovering drama queen to say?

“Nothing out the ordinary really…….Just a day like any other. “

For a mom that is.

“How was your day?” says this drama mama. “Tell me about your day I wanna hear all about it.”

Confessions of a Recovering Drama Queens daughter…

Being a Sunday school teacher is just another one of the amazing things I get to do. I mean, it has its challenges but mostly those kids teach me more than I teach them.

My middle daughter is in this class. It’s something we get to do together. Just us. Sarah is 9 years old and a freckly beauty with a heaping tablespoon of spunk. She’s my little spitfire.

Todays’ lesson was about John the Baptist. He ate locusts with honey, so we ate crunchy apple chips and honey. He taught on repentance for the forgiveness of sins. We learned about what that means. We learned the meaning of repentance was to be sorrowful, regretful of an action, but that true repentance leads to a change. Each child was given the opportunity to tell of a time they had done something they knew they shouldn’t have, that they still needed to confess.

I mostly heard about disobeying their parents. Some whining, complaining, lying and bad attitudes. Then it was my Sarah’s turn…..

“Last night when I was taking a shower in your bathroom……I used your razor and shaved my legs.”

Awkward silence followed by a classroom full of children with jaws open wide and belly laughing. They looked at me, then her…then me again……then her……

My brain is in re-computing mode. I’m trying to be careful with my response. Am I Sunday school teacher or am I mom?….Ok I’m both but which one responds here? Sunday school teacher is the right answer I think.

Some of the children are already betting on my punishment for her. That’s right, the children in my Sunday school class are placing bets and finding happiness in another’s’ punishment. Don’t you judge me.

Let’s back up a few months ago when her older sister, 11 was first allowed to shave. Since then she has regularly requested to do the same. Her most recent request was 2 weeks ago and our answer was the same. A clear no. She is just still too young. Yes she has black hair, yes she is kinda hairy. But not yet.

Let’s rewind to yesterday when I told her she could use my bathroom to shower. I purposely removed my razor from the shower. Because I know my spitfire so well. Yes, I moved it outside the shower.

All this going thru my mind when I try to muster up a decent, grown up,  Sunday school teacher response.

“I’m, so glad you told me the truth Sarah.” I said.

She was very strategic in her timing of this confession. After all, she knows my response may have been harsher if revealed at home. Such a smart,freckly, now hairless creature she is.

I love her so much. Forgiveness came quickly. Her thick black hair will grow back all the more dark and thick after that.  Enough of a consequence for now I think. The children seemed a bit disappointed I wasn’t more harsh. Nevertheless what better place for an illustration of grace to unfold then a Sunday school lesson about repentance.